It’s funny, thinking back on the misconceptions I’d had about parenting prior to giving birth to my daughter, Callie. There were several ideas I’d had in my head about how my life as a parent would go, and actually, many of which were wrong. By the time I had my son Clayton, I had it all figured out. Don’t judge, don’t assume (we all know what happens when you ass-u-me) and definitely don’t think you are going to be perfect. Seriously, you will be eating your words.
My kids were never going to eat too much sugar. They were never going to watch SpongeBob. They would be in bed by 8pm every night and they darn sure wouldn’t be sleeping in any bed but their own! By the time they were one-year-old, they’d be off the bottle, and if they had a pacifier, guess what peeps…that would be gone too. My kids would never be the ones throwing food at the fancy restaurant, or talking back, or being a brat in public. We’d spend evenings similar to the Brady Bunch or the Cleavers, eating dinner together and chatting about our day, followed up by a puzzle or some other family-fun, learning-type activity. Ha! How ignorant I was!
Can I give you sound advice from a real-life mommy of two kiddos? Shut your mouth. Seriously!! When you want to give unsolicited advice to another parent, or when you think for two seconds you know more than someone else about being a mommy…don’t go there. There’s nothing that pisses me off more than a person who a) has no kids or b) has less kids or a younger child than me telling me that Callie or Clayton shouldn’t do this, or shouldn’t do that. Unless you are my mom, or I ask for your advice…please keep it to yourself. I’m not an idiot! I watched other parents and said the same exact things…trust me. And guess what friends, Karma is a real you know what. It was my kids (both of them) throwing food at the restaurant, or talking back in front of company. Or going to bed super late after watching SpongeBob. Both my kiddos have slept in our bed off and on, and I’m just thankful to be able to use the word functional when I describe my family. We are who we are, and we are far from flawless.
I love the mother I have become, and I love the children I have made and taught and loved. However, I know that I was just like all the other moms out there, I wanted to be perfect, I wanted to be the best…I judged others thinking I’d do better. This race of motherhood isn’t a competition of who can finish last with the fastest time on the clock, it’s a silent war we must conquer in order to come out whole and sane when we cross that finish line. It’s just getting there that is the true victory.